Week 1: Marriage, Divorce, and Children

What is your view and definition of marriage? Did you think about your opinion? What do you think influences your opinion? These are all very important questions, especially if you read my blog :) This blog is all about the Family and more specifically Marriage (If you couldn't tell already, haha). I'm taking a Marriage class at the university I attend and this is my insights and views of the class and the material we read and study. This blog with have a huge christian basis along with secular studies and opinions. I hope you can find something interesting that you can apply to your life now to better relationships and situations in your own homes.

So this first week we studied divorce, single parent households, cohabitation and the effects it has on children. The one common trend between all the subjects covered was that no matter what situation a child is in, the one that provides a child with the best advantage socially, mentally, and emotionally was in a home with both parents in a good environment.

My personal view is that marriage is a sacred responsibility that cannot be taken lightly.

Divorce is such a prevalent thing in our world today because marriage is seen as such a trivial and unimportant thing. But Elder Oaks of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints says, “The cause (of divorce) is not incompatibility, but selfishness”. When you start focusing on yourself you stop thinking about those around you; you turn inward and develop selfish desires and thoughts and that pushes others away from you. But Elder Oaks gives amazing tips on how to avoid becoming “incompatible” with your spouse. First be best friends with one another, second, be kind and compassionate. Third, be sensitive to each others needs; fourth, always seek to make each other happy. And lastly, be partners in finances. If you find yourself focusing on their weaknesses, stop, and reflect on the events of the past and the amazing future you could have with them. Don’t let something so small or trivial come between you and eternal joy with someone you love. “Festering is destructive, but forgiving is divine”. Marriage isn’t as complicated as some make it seem. Yes you will have hard times and rough patches, everyone does. But according to Elder Oaks, “Marriage only requires a man and a woman committed to strive together toward perfection”. 

The importance of marriage isn’t just addressed by leaders in the church; in “The State of Our Unions” paper it talks about how marriage isn’t just a “private arrangement”, but that it’s a “complex social institution”. Marriage affects every child, wither you are married, cohabitation couple, single parent, gay, or lesbian. How we raise children and especially in what environment we raise them in shapes them for life. We have the responsibility to shape the future generation in a good and loving environment.